Married In Ohio

California Girl and I went to visit The Boy over the long weekend. He’s only been gone for a couple of weeks; but it was still good to see him. He seems to be adjusting well to life on his own. He seemed a lot older and a lot more confident than he was when we left him. Except for the huge pile of laundry in the corner he was adjusting well to college life. (Or perhaps that is the way of college students.) While we were on campus, I was struck by how different this year is from years gone by. It was warm enough to get into the pool; but, instead of relaxing in the back yard, we were walking around on a college campus. Except for the size, the campus is very similar to the one where I went to school. Although we think he’s more like his mother; perhaps he’s more like me than we think.

Except for the fact that the hotel which we had reservations was overbooked and we had to spend the night after we arrived at a dump until rooms became available at our preferred location, I really enjoyed our visit. With all of the restaurants and shops that cater to students so close by, college life is so convenient. Where we live, you have to get in a car to go anywhere. The closest bus stop is miles away. So, everything being in walking distance was a nice change.

I don’t know when we’ll get back to see him. He is adapting very well. Unfortunately, his mom, his sister, and I, are still getting used to him being gone.

As you probably figured out, our recent absence in the world of blogging was due to taking The Boy to college. After the commotion of getting up early, packing the car and the ensuing drive, the time to say goodbye was suddenly on us. No tears were shed; but it was clearly a significant moment. He’s been away from home before; but we always knew exactly when he was going to return. It was always I’ll be back to pick you up on Saturday or the bus gets back to school at 6:00 P.M. Never, I’ll see you around; but I don’t know when. The emptiness in the house the next day after we returned was palpable. No music playing. No Doom monsters growling. Just silence and an empty chair. People say kids grow up fast. Now I truly know what that means. I can’t believe 18 years has gone by since that day in June that I held him up to the window and let him take his first glimpse of the world. Now he’s out in the world all by himself without a safety net (me). I’m sure that he’s doing fine; but I’m not sure that I am.

We had the last pizza night for The Boy today. This time next week, he’ll be college bound. California Girl and I really didn’t think about it until The Girl mentioned that today would be his last family pizza night for awhile. The current phase is ending and a new chapter is about to begin. We’re proud that he’s ready to take the next step and think that he’ll do fine; but we’re still going to miss him.

The Girl and I were involved in a philosophical discussion until the early hours of the morningon Tuesday/Wednesady. It was a “good” conversation, especially considering the last few posts where I lamented that she wasn’t learning the lessons of life. She seems to have a better outlook and a better understanding of things. And, she has resolved to make some positive changes in her behavior. Sometimes, things happen when you least expect them to.

P.S. Because it is so late our “Tuesday” post will be delayed. Look for it sometime on Wednesday.

The Girl stayed out too late and got herself grounded. That was hard to do since I was flexible in what time I expected her to be home. Unfortunately for her, she didn’t return when she said she would. Doing things that she says she’s going to do when she says that she’s going to do them seems to be a hard lesson for her. It wasn’t the time that she got back so much as the fact that she was late. Not being finished on time is not good when it comes to schoolwork or a job when she reaches the age when she has to work for a living. We don’t want to take her childhood away; but, the day will soon come when she asks for the car keys. And when that happens, we want to be comfortable that she’ll be home when scheduled and we won’t be worrying about what might have happened because she’s late.

P.S. for those of you who are younger, Mickey Mouse used to be a popular watch design for kids.

After a week of unsuccessfully lobbying us to pay for a bigger share, The Girl finally got a new mobile phone. She had been holding out for a model which was much more expensive; but we declined to increase our contribution. I think it was a good financial lesson for her. Her choices were to make due with a partially working phone that can only place and receive calls and save her money toward a new one with a lot of nifty features. Or get a more affordable model and go back to texting her friends a gazillion times a day. That’s a choice that we as adults make quite often; but it’s one that she really needed to think and reflect on. Hopefully, she’ll remember the lesson.

The Girl had a party 16^th birthday past this past Saturday. It wasn’t her actual birthday yet; but it was the best day for it. It was a HUGE event. Even bigger and better than the one she had when she turned 14. The kids were surprisingly well behaved. A few kids got wet that didn’t want to; but there was very little horseplay. Her friends have really grown up. I think I’ve mellowed a bit too. I remember remarking how “skimpy” the girls’ swimwear was a couple of years ago. On Saturday, quite a few of them wearing string bikinis and the rest of them were wearing two piece suits; but I hardly even noticed. I’ve learned not to worry about such things. Just like with adults I’m a lot more concerned with what is on the inside rather than what is on the outside.

It rained off and on during the day but it cleared long enough for the party to be a success. Pool parties can be great fun but not if it’s raining. It was warm and the sun was shining except when there were a few brief showers. We had been considering having a friend DJ the event (free except for tip). Ultimately, we decided to buy and download all of the music from iTunes instead. That way, The Girl could play all of her favorite songs whenever she wanted. It was just a birthday party; but, in many ways, it seemed like planning a wedding. I know that day is far away; but, The Girl is starting to seem really grown up.

I helped The Boy set up his first web site today. I recommended that he use a content management system like WordPress or phpBB; but he insisted on doing it in hand crafted HNTL. I looks “primitive” compared to what you get with sophisticated CMS software, and the colors are kind of garish; but its 100% his. From checking the logs, it looks like he’s the only one who has accessed it; but it seemed like an appropriate supplementary birthday present. What better present for someone who enjoys doing things on the computer than their very own home on the web.

And, speaking of technology, I got a new gigabit switch to upgrade our home network. It’s not very exciting technology; but I was still waiting anxiously for the package truck.

Observant readers will have noticed that one of these sentences in About Us section of the side bar recently changed to “We have two kids, a son, 18, and a daughter, 15.” Although he is still a kid to us, The Boy is technically an adult. Things don’t seem much different now than they did before his birthday; but it seems strange to call someone who is 18 years old a “kid”. About the only change now is that he’s old enough to sign forms for himself. California Girl and I are amazed at how quickly the time has passed. He’ll still be at home for another couple of months then it’s off to college at which point we’re sure things will be totally different. We’re not looking forward to that day.

I spent some time this past weekend organizing photographs of the kids. I hadn’t realized since it happened so gradually but the girl had grown a lot. She was much bigger than when she was a year ago. I take a bunch of pictures; but I haven’t been indexing and categorizing them as much as I should recently since it makes me feel a bit sad. Nothing drives home the point that The Boy had finished high school and won’t be home this fall like looking at photos from his graduation. Or from his final cross country or wrestling meets. A lot of people look forward to an empty nest; but that is something that California Girl and I have never done. We really like having the kids around. With The Boy so far away, I think we’ll be driving a lot more than usual this fall.