Married In Ohio

I “overslept” today which is a polite way of saying that I spent some quality time with California Girl this morning. I wonder if the people I work with have any idea what we do when we are “sleeping”. I’m probably in a better mood that usually when I first arrive in the office; but other than that, I am unaware if there are any other outward signs. I try not to look guilty when I get to work; but, some days, I can’t help but laugh when I think what I was doing while the early arrivers were tapping away on their keyboards. The Monday after Easter is not as hectic as a typical Monday since many people are away on spring break. The morning’s activities may it a very relaxed.

I can hardly wait until May when California Girl and I can resume our summer schedule. I don’t need to get up and out early in order to get the kids to school, so, there are always a lot of mornings like this one. If it was an everyday occurrence, I probably would not appreciate it as much. Days like today are precious since days like today are so rare when school is in session. Even though we both have to work, California Girl and I can still have fun while the kids are on break. The skies got cloudy as the day went on; but we certainly put a bright sunny morning to good use. Hopefully tomorrow will be another sunny day.

We went to a very nice restaurant on Saturday night to celebrate The Boy’s college plans. It was fabulous. We all dressed in evening attire and spent almost 2 hours being pampered. We can’t afford to do things like that very often; but California Girl and I thought that it would be a nice way to recognize The Boy’s accomplishments. Pretty soon, it will be party of three; so it was good to live large with The Boy. We call him The Boy; but he is really almost a man. I have been having some very serious conversations with him. Like most teenagers, he likes to have fun; but he understands the big picture much better than most kids his age. Despite being quiet and introspective, he has a lot of insight into people and things. I think that ability will serve him well in life.

We also went to another “last” for The Boy. It seems like his senior year is just flying by. I’m both proud and sad at the same time. I’m glad to see him doing so well in his final few months of high school; but sad to turn the page. California Girl and I are more than mom and dad; so are relationship with him will continue even when he doesn’t “need” us anymore. But there won’t be as many opportunities for the spontaneous good times that we have enjoyed. He’s needed his share of pep talks; but he brightens our lives with his quick with far more than he needs cheering up. Some of the things he has said are priceless.

As we zoom toward the day that California Girl and I will be taking The Boy off to school, we can’t help but think about how quiet it will be in the house with only one kid. The kids are only two years apart, and The Girl learned to talk at a very young age, so most of the past 15 years has been filed with their conversations. As any parent will attest, a four year old has some very interesting conversations with a two year old. Some of our fondest memories are of the kids talking to each other. When they were small babies every day was a grand adventure and they took great pleasure in the simplest things. I’ll never forget some of the conversations they had as they explored the bags from the grocery store.

They were inseparable as they grew and went through their elementary school days. I often said, for example, that it was like having the mind of a five year old with the size and manual dexterity of a seven year old. Whatever they did, they always did together. Some days were very trying but I still wouldn’t trade them for anything. Nowadays, they talk about the teams that they play on or other things (e.g. teachers and fellow students) from school. They’ve been doing a lot together, even for them. California Girl and I get the feeling that they‘re both starting to realize that their days together are almost over. The Girl is very, very unlikely to go to the came college as The Boy, so this coming August is a new chapter for everyone.

Thighs-n-Eyez commented in the shoutbox:

I love you both! May I ask why you didn’t get married before you lived together? Also, what made you want to get married to CG, MCB after you guys were already living together?

We decide to respond in a post since the answer is more than 500 characters.

Even when we had separate places, we didn’t spend very much time apart, so, it didn’t seem to make very much sense to do anything else. It seemed almost like “hedging or bet” which wasn’t how either of us felt. Plus, neither set of parent’s approved off our relationship, so a wedding which is typically for family and friends was difficult to arrange. Everyone wants their wedding to be special, and we were no different, so, even though it was something that we expected, it was very frustrating. In a way, because our relationship was so controversial, we didn’t receive a lot of pressure from our parents to “do the right thing”. And, remember, by the mid to late 1980’s living together had lost the stigma that it once had and was becoming much more widespread, especially for people of our generation.

We got married because we both like having a spouse. There is a sense of commitment and permanence that living together doesn’t have. It may just have been in our minds; but it was important to us. I liked the idea of proposing and trying to make a special moment to California Girl. We like having an anniversary to celebrate. Unlike a lot of men, I always wear my wedding band, probably even at times that I shouldn’t. We ended up having a small wedding; but it’s still part of our shared history together. We like to focus on the positive; but were a lot of external things gong on that made our life much more difficult. We’ve always made our own way without muchany help. In, fact, I was just mentioning to California Girl about an event that happened around that time that I consider a watershed moment in my personal history. We make decisions more for ourselves and each other than almost anyone that you will ever meet. We wanted to get married so we did.

It’s hard for us to believe; but one day soon, I’m going to take The Girl to the bureau of motor vehicles to get her temporary learner’s permit. Someday in the not too distant future she’ll be driving. And, not to long after that, she’ll be getting ready to go off to college. I know that it’s still two years away; but The Boy’s sophomore year doesn’t seem like that long ago. I think that she’ll be a good driver. It’s just when your youngest is about to start driving they don’t seem like kids anymore. I know it will make things more convenient. And cut down on some of the late nights that I have been having. But it’s forcing us to face the fact that our kids aren’t really kids.

Now that the holidays are over, we’ve been having a hard time getting back into the swing of things. After a fabulous vacation, it’s hard to wake up and follow our normal schedule. And, our next day off seems very, very far away. Sometimes, I wish we took some time off for spring break like the kids do. We’ve had much the same vacation schedule for many years; so we’re used to a “flat spot” in early January; but, for some reason, this year is much harder than usual. Perhaps it’s because of the long hours at work before the break. Or maybe is because it’s the last Christmas with The Boy. We aren’t sure what the reason is; but, our energy level isn’t what it normally is. Winter has only just begun and we’re longing for the lazy days of summer.

January
HNT was suspended for a week.
I finished a major milestone on a project I was doing at work so I came home early and made a movie to celebrate. It’s funny how sex helps us celebrate our victories and drown our sorrows.

February
Celebrated the two year anniversary of Married In Ohio.
The Boy’s wrestling team won the league championship. The Girl scored a hat trick (three goals) in soccer for the first time in years. California Girl and I really enjoy kids that are good athletes and good students.

March
Got a new car. Discovered it was good for other things besides transportation.
Posted our first and only book review.

April
Watched one of the darkest days unfold on a college campus in recent memory.
Got out and about (for sex) for the first time in the new vehicle.

May
Had some fun both inside and outside of the car.

June
More sex in the great outdoors.

Married In Ohio was offline for four days while we were on vacation and enjoying life in the 3-D world.
Went over 1,000,000 visitors.

July
California Girl started completely shaving her pubic hair.

We were able to get in the pool and relax over the long Fourth of July Weekend.

August
It really started to sink in how The Boy’s final year in high school is a series of highs and lows.
My favorite view of California Girl.

September
We’ll always be Bengals fans regardless of their record.

Had a reason to do the Snoopy dance.

October
Watched The Boy win some iron in cross country as well as run his final cross country race.
Changed to an even shorter hairstyle.

November
Sparked quite a bit of discussion in comments and emails with our Have We Thought… post.
Posted our first higher quality video.

December

Didn’t have sex under the Christmas tree this year but had a wonderful substitute.

Made a digital photo frame (Flash slide show) of many of the year’s Two for Tuesday photographs.

Happy New Year! The first days of a new year is always a good time to reflect back on the past year and make resolutions for the year ahead.

Here’s last year’s resolutions and how I did.

1. Have oral sex with California Girl every time she trims her pubic hair. I’ve had this one on my list for several years, including last year. California Girl started going completely bare in July and, as a result, started shaving every day. So, while I had the “breakfast of champions” as much as in previous years, I ended up farther away from the goal.
2. Get to a point where I can stop worrying about my weight. I hover at the upper end of the “ideal range”. I’d like to lose enough so that gaining a couple of pounds won’t affect which zone I’m in. I haven’t lost the ever elusive 5 pounds; but I do worry less about my weight. I’ve been maintaining my “normal” weight for many years now so I don’t worry about it quite so much.
3. Get more money. The Boy will be starting college soon and we are so not ready for it financially. I don’t know what else this means yet but I know that status quo will not suffice. I did get a pay raise which is not too common in these times; especially in the field that I am in. It’s not nearly enough but every little bit helps.
4. Do better at the “homeowner thing”. I didn’t always cut the grass as frequently as I should have; especially in late spring and early fall when the kids were busy with sports. The great drought of 2007 made this one easy. Our grass is still alive; but it didn’t grow nearly as fast as usual.
5. Live large. Party hearty. This one is periodically on my list. Sometimes I become too focused on work and other things to enjoy life like I should. There’s always another job but I’ve only got one family. The summer was good; but I worked like a dog the last few months of the year. We were able to purchase a very much needed new vehicle. And, I’m still on Christmas vacation so all in all I’d say I did OK at this one.

And here are my resolutions for 2008.

1. Have oral sex with California Girl every time she trimsshaves her pubic hair. I’ve had variations of this one on my list for several years, including last year. It’s a bit more challenging, which is part of the fun, now that she shaves her pubic hair every day.
2. Do something extra special for California Girl. This year, we will celebrate our 20^th wedding anniversary. There’s going to be a lot of changes with The Boy going off to college and The Girl learning how to drive; but I don’t want to lose sight of the one person who’s always been there for us all. I’ve got some Ideas; but, obviously, I can’t mention them here.
3. Post to this blog more frequently; and visit other people’s blogs more regularly (and earlier in the day). I know that blogging is a hobby and sometimes real life gets in the way; but the intermittent posting and sporadic commenting that I have been doing recently is a symptom of the (dis)order in my life in general. I need to slow down and accept the fact that I can’t do everything all the time.
4. Do better keeping things neat and clean around the house. I’m an incurable neatnik; but recently, I’ve developed some bad habits that I don’t particularly care for. I’m going to make an extra special effort to break them
5. Live large. Party hearty. This the last year that the four of us will all be together. I really want for it to be a memorable one.

P.S. I was going to post this yesterday but I was too busy doing nothing in particular.

I was going to post this yesterday but I was too busy having nothing to do that I didn’t get around to it. It wasn’t easy but we delivered our project on time and under cost. So, now I’m on Christmas vacation. The kids still have to go to school but that just gives me more time to spend with California Girl. After taking them to school, I came home and climbed back into bed. Except for sex, I didn’t do anything until almost two o’clock in the afternoon. After dog days and double dog days, it was nice to be free.

Some of you with Blogger blogs may have noticed that I started using my OpenID when I’ve left comments on your blog. I finally had the time to install some software updates that had been long undone and that was one of them. And, for that matter, I think I’m finally caught up on everyone’s blog. I’m even considering configuring and building a new computer his holiday season. It’s not the first thing on the list; but it’s still nice that the list is getting shorter rather than longer.

California Girl has to work so I try not to be too distracting. Usually, she’s the one who is on vacation when I am not, so it seems a bit strange that she still has work to do. She works at home, so I try to not get in the way too much, but that doesn’t stop us from getting re-acquainted with each other. Anyway, I’ll be back a little later on with some pictures for Two For Tuesday.

And did I say that the project that drained almost all the life out of me was very well received? I guess I did; but it’s still good to savor the success.

Saturday was the first day of wrestling season and The Boy looked good. I’m amazed at how much he has improved in the off season. It was a long day (like all wresting tournaments) but I thoroughly enjoyed it. After spending so much time at work these past few weeks, it was good to spend some time with The Boy doing something that he enjoys. And, despite him having to make weight, we were all able to go out to eat on Friday night. The madness of working to make a critical deadline at work seems very far away.

I’m gong to miss days like yesterday when they are gone. It’s very hectic but I really enjoy my kids doing their sports. We’re usually all there unless there’s a conflict and they are competing at the same time. The Boy is pretty tough; but The Girl still gets worked up when he is out there on the mat. I know they don’t think about it when they are out there; but I worry about think getting injured. Cross country isn’t very dangerous; but I lost track of how many knee injuries I saw happen on the soccer field. And there were two serious injuries in the tournament yesterday.

I like to sit back and watch the kids interact with each other. I have bad luck in a lot of areas, but not with them. They are as close as a brother and sister could be. They are really gong to miss each other when The Boy goes away to college. Christmas Vacation is fast approaching and I can’t wait. I’ve only been working the long, long days for a few weeks; but I feel like I have missed so much of their lives. It really helped reinforce what the most important things in life are.