Just A Freshman
The Girl did not have one of her better games on Saturday. She played great in the first half and bad in the second half. I didn’t say much to her after the game. She let the other team take her out of her game in the second half and she knew it. Athletically she can compete with anyone but mentally she is still a freshman and it showed on Saturday. I usually have something encouraging to say; but I couldn’t think of much to cheer her up. Intellectually, she knows that the better she plays the more “attention” she is going to draw from opposing defenses. But it still bothers her. She’s got quite a collection of cuts, scrapes and bruises. She will adapt but I hate to see her so down on herself. Does anyone out there have any advice on what to say? If so, I’d love to her it.
It took The Boy a while to adjust to the higher level of competition in high school too. He learned quickly that you can’t recover from mistakes as easily as when he and his opponents were younger. But he just figured he had to pay his dues as a freshman and didn’t let a tough loss get under his skin. To him, a bad meet was a learning experience. To The Girl, a bad game is a personal failure. Sometimes, she forgets it’s just a game. I wonder if this is a girl thing. Any insights that anyone has are welcome.
P.S. The Boy has been fighting injury for the past couple of weeks in cross country but he has really “answered the bell” at race time. Wrestling is his first love and he’s pretty good at it; but he’s doing so well at cross country that I’m starting to think it may be his best sport. And he still hasn’t run his best race yet.
So it seems she takes things rather personally, and very much to heart. You can maybe share her brothers experiences at mature-ing into the team. Of course, you are just willing to listen. Some things just have to be lived through.
I would worry about the silence… Too much internalizing is probably a bad thing. Maybe jsut a “what did you think about the game today?” type of thing to get her to open up….
Internal steaming is never a good thing..
Rosie: Unfortunately, the situation is different. When The Boy was wrestling as a freshman, they didn’t have a full JV team so they didn’t expect to win a lot when they were competing against full teams. But soccer is completely a team sport. It doesn’t matter what you do as an individual. You’re only as good as your weakest player. Everyone needs to play well for them to be successful. And because she is a good player, The Girl has challenging assignments.
DisappearingJohn: She played “bad” and she knows it. And that puts a lot of pressure on her teammates. The team is young and she is one of the few who can compete against older girls. They would be great if everyone was the same age as they are but that’s not going to happen that often. So their better athletes (like The Girl) have to do more. It would be easier mentally if she was a role player but she’s not. She has to be able to make plays for them to be successful. It’s kind of an uneven bar for her and some of the other girls compared with the rest of the team but that’s the situation.
Has school begin in your family yet? Ours began this week and I have to admit I don’t like to have to conform to that new schedule!
Kelly: They have been back in school for a couple of weeks. I haven’t adjusted to not being able to hit the snooze on the alarm either.
Oh no…see we don’t start until after Labor day..so this is the first week on the new schedule.
I don’t like the new schedule!
Kelly: I don’t like the new schedule either. Everything is just too early in the morning for both me and the kids.